The Vibration of Love - Chapter 3
‘Space and time are modes in which we think, not conditions in which we live.’ - Einstein
Rob called my mother, and she came to pick up the kids. Then he called my therapist, Dr. Carmichael. She said to come to her office immediately.
We both walked into Dr. Carmichael’s office, and I started crying again as soon as I sat down. Rob put his arms around me, and I leaned against his shoulder.
“It has to be the drugs,” I sobbed. “All those years of screwing with my brain’s chemistry have sent me over the edge. I’m losing my mind.”
Dr. Carmichael handed me the tissues. “Bella, tell me what’s going on.”
I related the story of my dream and the more recent ‘trip’ to the Twilight Zone.
“It feels so real,” I said. It doesn’t feel like any dream I’ve ever had. When I wake up from a dream, it’s hazy, and eventually I don’t remember the details very well. But I remember every detail of this hallucination or alternate reality, or whatever the hell it is!” I sobbed against Rob’s shoulder.
“Bella, this doesn’t fit into any sort of psychological condition I’ve ever heard of, and you have no other symptoms that would point to schizophrenia or multiple personality disorder,” Dr. Carmichael said.
“Then what is wrong with me?” I wailed.
“Bella, we will figure this out. I need to do some research. Can you come back tomorrow at the same time?” I nodded.
“Rob, can you take time off and stay with her? She shouldn’t be alone until we figure this out.”
“Yes, of course,” he said.
Rob wrapped his arm around me and led me to the car. He opened the door, and I climbed in. I leaned my head back. Rob slid into the driver’s seat and brushed my cheek with his fingers. “How are you feeling?” He asked.
“I’ve got a bad headache from crying. It will get so much worse if I wait until we get home to take something. I hate to make you do this, but can you please run into the closest drugstore and get me some Excedrin Migraine?”
“I’ll definitely try,” he said.
He pulled into a drugstore parking lot, parked and kissed my forehead. “I’ll be back as fast as I can.”
I shut my eyes because the light was making my headache worse. A minute later, I heard, “Love, are you alright?”
“Shit,” I said, without opening my eyes. “Rob, please tell me you’re just fucking with me.” There was no response.
I opened my eyes, and Edward was looking back at me. I was sitting in his Volvo. I burst into tears.
“Why? Why is this happening? Oh God, I can’t cry anymore. My head feels like it’s going to explode. Can you please get me some goddamn Excedrin Migraine?” I yelled at Edward.
I saw a blur; the car door opened and closed, and Edward was gone. I looked around; we were parked in front of Charlie’s house. About three minutes later, Edward returned with a new box of Excedrin Migraine and a bottle of water. He opened the box, handed me two capsules, then opened the water bottle, and handed it to me.
“Thank you,” I said, and swallowed the pills. “Where did you get these?” I asked.
“I ran to the pharmacy,” he said.
“How far is that?” I asked.
“About five miles,” he said.
I shook my head.
“Bella, you’ve never had a migraine before,” he said. “Maybe the headache and the hallucinations are related.”
“Yes, that’s comforting,” I said. “Maybe instead of just going insane, I have a brain tumor, and I’m going to die any day now.”
“Not while you have a vampire for a boyfriend, you’re not,” he said and smiled
I did not find his attempt at humor even remotely amusing. “You will NOT under ANY circumstances bite me! Are we clear on that?” I said.
I had seen the tortured look on his face before, but now he had to look away to hide his expression. I saw him fighting to gain control of his emotions.
“Edward,” I said, much more gently. “Please don’t do this to yourself. I know you believe that I’m your Bella having some sort of panic attack about you, but I’m not her!” We were both quiet for a minute, and then I continued. “Edward,” I took his hand. “Up until the time you met Bella, she thought vampires were fictional characters. Most of the humans in your world believe vampires aren’t real. Is it such a hard stretch for you to open your mind to the possibility that what I am saying is true?”
He looked at me for a moment, and I assumed he was reading my thoughts.
“Bella, I’ve always been afraid that something like this would happen. I didn’t imagine that you would start hallucinating and believe that you had another life with a human husband and human children, but I always expected that some day you would realize how wrong I was for you.”
I didn’t know what else to say. I didn’t understand what was happening to me, so how could I convince him. A better question was why did I want to convince him? He’s not real!
I saw him wince, and realized he had heard that. “I’m sorry,” I said.
“You can’t help what you think,” he snapped. “Do you want me to go inside with you?”
I looked at Charlie’s house. “No, thank you,” I said. “That’s not my house, Edward. I don’t want to go in there. You at least look familiar to me. There would be nothing familiar about that house or being around Charlie, and I don’t want to try to explain these hallucinations to him. Can you just take me to your house? Have Alice tell him I’m sleeping over, or something?”
“Yes, of course,” he said, “whatever you want to do.” He started the car and drove back to the Cullen’s.
We were silent for a minute, and then I asked, “Edward, the last thing I remember from ‘this world,’ or wherever I am, is being in Carlisle’s study with you and him. What happened after that?”
“You were telling Carlisle and me that we were not real. You said your real life was in Southern California with your husband and two children, and then you passed out. I grabbed you and laid you on the sofa in Carlisle’s office. You woke up a few minutes later and didn’t remember anything after being in the woods with me.”
“Could you read her thoughts?” I asked.
He shook his head. “What do you remember?” He asked.
“I woke up on the floor of our garage,” he interrupted me.
“Your garage in Southern California?” He asked.
“Yes,” I said. “That’s the last place I remember being before I showed up here. Rob was kneeling next to me. When I woke up, I hugged him and through my sobs, told him something was very wrong. He called my mom to come and pick up the children, and then we went to see my doctor. She said my symptoms didn’t appear to be like any psychiatric illness.”
“Carlisle said the same thing. Your symptoms don’t fall into any specific category of mental illness. He’s researching it now,” he said.
“My doctor is too. Hopefully one of them will figure this out,” I said.
We pulled up to the Cullen’s house, and Edward zoomed around to open my door. “Thank you,” I said. He nodded and led me toward the house. When I walked in, the entire family was sitting in the living room. Every eye turned toward me. I stared back at them. They were all so breathtakingly beautiful. Of course, the actors who played them in the movies were all very beautiful humans, but these beings clearly were not human.
“How do you guys blend in?” I wondered aloud. “You’re all so beautiful.” They just smiled.
Jasper walked over and stood in front of me. He stared at me for a moment.
“Hello,” I said. He nodded and looked at Edward, obviously communicating some message he didn’t want me to hear.
“That’s rude, you know,” I said.
“Oh, sorry,” said Jasper.
Edward said, “Jasper was telling me that he’s registering a range of emotions that he’s never noticed in you before. He also pointed out that your scent is different.”
At that, every head in the room nodded. Emmett stood up and walked toward me. He was so much larger than Kellen, that I took an involuntary step backward.
“I’m sorry, Bella,” he said, stepping back. “I didn’t mean to frighten you.” He smiled warmly.
“Oh, it’s OK. You’re just so much bigger than the actor who plays you. It was a little overwhelming,” I said. Emmett shot Edward a concerned glance.
“Jasper’s right,” Emmett said. “She does have a different scent. You didn’t pick up on that, Edward?”
“I did notice it,” Edward said, “but I assumed it had something to do with whatever is causing this condition. Whatever is creating these symptoms has so altered Bella that her perception of reality has changed. It didn’t seem like a huge leap to assume it altered her chemical structure as well.”
Esme stood up. “Bella, are you hungry or thirsty? Can I get you something?”
“Yes, Esme, I am very hungry, actually. I guess all this alternate reality hopping takes a lot of energy,” I said.
She smiled. “I’ll be right back.”
I watched her walk away. “Wow, she’s exactly like she’s written. She’s the perfect mother.” I realized I was thinking aloud, as I noticed everyone staring at me. “Oh, sorry,” I said.
“Bella, it’s OK. Come sit down,” Carlisle said.
“Carlisle, do you have any theories?” I asked as I sat down next to him.
“Bella, your symptoms don’t fit with any medical condition that I know of,” he said.
“Yes, that’s exactly what my doctor told me,” I said.
He looked at Edward, and Edward explained what I had told him about being back in my ‘Southern California’ reality.
“This is all very Trekish,” said Emmett.
I looked at him. “You’re a Trekkie?” I asked.
“Trekker, please,” he laughed.
“Oh, excuse me!” I smiled for the first time that day. “You know, Emmett, you’re right. That’s exactly what this feels like! Do you remember the episode where Worf gets caught in some time space thing and keeps shifting realities?”
“Yes!” Emmett said, “That’s one of my favorite episodes. It’s Parallels, episode number 163!”
I shook my head. “You know the episode number?” I asked.
He tapped his head, “Vampire,” he said.
“Do you have it?” I asked.
“Hell, yeah, I have the whole series, of course.” I saw a blur, and he was back with the DVD. He popped it in the player, and the whole family watched.
The premise of the show was that Worf had been traveling alone in a shuttlecraft. When he returned to the Enterprise, he started noticing subtle inconsistencies in reality that continued to become more pronounced. For example, as the show progressed, Riker was the Captain, and Worf was married to Dianna. In Worf’s reality, Picard was the captain, and he and Dianna were only friends. Eventually, the crew figured out that Worf's RNA had an unusual quantum signature, and that he was essentially a being from a different universe. The crew theorized that Worf passed through a time-space fissure, which caused Worf to quantum flux between several parallel universes.
When the show was over, everyone looked at me. “That’s what this feels like. I feel like I’m shifting between parallel realities,” I said.
“Yeah, but in Worf’s case, all of the people were the same across realities. You’re saying that back in your other reality, we are considered fictional characters?” Emmett asked.
“Exactly,” I said. “Think about it. Up until a few years ago, your Bella didn’t know vampires and werewolves were real.”
“Bella,” Alice said, “Edward told us you said you were married to the actor that plays him in a movie?”
“Yes,” I said. “His name is Robert Pattinson.”
“That’s the guy in the Harry Potter movie that looks like Edward,” said Emmett.
I stared at Emmett. “You know who Rob is?” I asked, stunned.
There was a blur and Emmett was back with the Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire DVD. He loaded it and when the menu appeared, he selected the scene where Dumbledore pulls Cedric’s name out of the Goblet of Fire. When the screen displayed a close up of Rob, Emmett paused the movie.
“Is that your husband?” Alice asked. I nodded. “We all always thought he looked just like Edward.” I saw Edward roll his eyes.
“You don’t think he looks like you?” I asked Edward. He shook his head.
“He is a lot younger there, and you’re certainly much paler,” I said.
I looked back at the paused image of Rob and was suddenly overwhelmed with fear that I wouldn’t see him again. I buried my head in my hands and started to cry. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up. I was back in Rob’s Porsche and looking into the eyes of my husband. “Oh thank God!” I said, and grabbed him. “Please don’t leave me alone again. I know I asked you to go in there, but don’t leave me. It happened again.”
“I won’t, baby,” he said, as he held me.
“I’m so scared,” I sobbed. “What is wrong with me? Why does this keep happening?”
The next chapter is titled, “Bella in Wonderland.”
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland (1865) (commonly shortened to "Alice in Wonderland") is a novel written by Lewis Carrol. It tells the story of a girl named Alice who falls down a rabbit hole into a fantasy world populated by peculiar and anthropomorphic creatures. There have been several movie versions of this book.
Through the Looking Glass, and What Alice Found There (1871) is the sequel to Alice's Adventures in Wonderland.
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